Lord

As surely as I have worshiped at the altar of cheap pleasure I have made her an idol in my heart

Inside I feel like weeping at the loss. At my ignorance, and at the thought I may one day have to watch her fall in love with another.

Am I hearing you say to weep, to embrace this imagined pain, to allow it to push me closer towards you?

JESUS: Yes, that is what I’m saying. It’s okay to be sad, to lament, to desire something good so strongly and yet allow me to heal you of your idolatry. I have told you Bud I will give you strength, I will show you you are a man, and when I do I will grant you another heart to love because then you will be able to love as I do.

ME: But when and who?

JESUS: When I say and who I say? It may be who you’re thinking of but follow my directions on that. What are you hearing right now?

ME: Let it go, but I keep picking it back up again.

JESUS: Then just keep letting it go.

ME: Okay, so now what?

JESUS: Just relax. You will be good. Trust me.

ME: Yes I know. But I really do want her.

JESUS: I know what you want. Keep your heart pure and I just may grant you what you’re asking, and besides I’ve already said you’re going to find someone to cleave to, and if it’s not her…

ME: Please?

JESUS: *smiling* I will be with you. Now turn away from this computer and go. Now.